am getting really sick of having dreams about people.  I have these very vivid dreams about people from my past.  I'll tell you about the one I had last night.

It was my 22nd birthday, which is in nine months already... that's crazy.  Celia and Sarah Hemmerich were there, along with Hilary Kirkeng, Siranda Jacobs... if you know them, you know the whole gang of people who were there... Caitlyn Berz, there's another one.  Anyway, they made me this really cute cake... it was all decorated and the icing was green... I remember that very vividly.  Anyway, we had gone out to dinner or something and were all living in Reuter by each other, and they had cut the cake.  I don't know if I went to the bathroom or something, but I left and when I came back, there were only two peices of cake left, and I hadn't had any yet.  Celia or Ashley or someone took one of them, and then for some reason, Tara was there, and she was eating the other.  I told her to stop, because I hadn't had any yet.  She said okay, and I must have gone to the bathroom or something, and when I came back, she was locked in her bedroom and the cake was gone.  I was so mad, I ran out of the room and ran outside to campus... except it wasn't the campus of UW- L at all.  For some stupid reason, the only person I wanted to talk to was my ex- boyfriend.  So, I started running... like super fast.  I found him, and I was like 'I just need to vent', and he agreed, which he would NEVER do because: A. He hates me and B. As much as he hates me, he hates listening to me vent even more.  But, for some reason, he agreed, and we started walking and talking together.  As soon as I was about to start talking, he ran into all these people that he knew, and they pulled him away and made them walk with him.  I was like, whatever, but then I realized that I would only feel better about Tara eating my cake if I told him.  So, again, I started running really fast to catch up to him, and finally found him sitting at a picnic table in a park... with some girl who had a basket full of bath salts and massage oils and stuff.  I'm pretty sure there were also some points in my dream where I was naked, and I was definately barefoot the entire time.  And I found my ex- boyfriend by the dorm we both lived in when I was a freshman... Baird, for those of you who know UW- L well enough. 

This was by far one of the weirdest dreams I've ever had.  But it fits, because yesterday I was in Green Bay, and we stopped in Appleton for dinner, which is where my ex- boyfriend lives.  I saw a sign advertising massages in Amanda's dorm building, and we talked about that, we also talked about our high school pasts and the people that, for better or worse, stick out in our minds from those days.  We also had mentioned Hilary, because she used to go to UW- Green Bay with Amanda, but transferred to Madison.  So, I guess the smaller parts fit together, but the whole story is seriously messed up.

I've been in Sparta a lot this vacation, and I think it's been pretty great.  Obviously, I was in town for Christmas, and for New Year's Eve, I babysat for my parents' friends so they could all go out.  I went back to La Crosse to move into my new place and get settled, but now I'm back, staying with Sarah and Amanda while my parents are in Mexico... the jerks.  I haven't even gone outside today because it's negative fourteen without the windchill.  Every school in the area was cancelled, and Sparta NEVER cancels school.  My sisters and I have managed to let each other live... for the time being.  I think a week is the maximum my parents can ask us to coexist together anymore, barring any major catastrophies. 

No news on the job search.  I've got an application to hand in at Java Detour when I get back.  My cousin works there and says they need help like no other, so hopefully that will work out.  I don't know.  I'm worried that if I start working again, I'll fall behind on my studies.  The way the economy is, though, I won't have to worry about that.  It's hard as hell to find a job these days... The other thing is that I feel like it's the time in my life when I should be looking for a job that will actually give me experience in the field I'm going into.  But the firms I've contacted don't need any help at the current time.  Damn lawyers...

I'm not quite sure how I've been.  I try not to let myself think.  Either I find a movie to watch, or I read.  I've been doing a lot of reading lately.  I've read: 'Twilight', 'New Moon', 'Eclipse', 'Breaking Dawn' and am now reading 'The Fountainhead'.  We've been re- watching the Harry Potter movies, and I've caught up on every season of Gossip Girl, the first season of Ugly Betty, and the first season of Desperate Housewives.  I've also seen 'Twilight', 'Bedtime Stories' and 'Marley & Me' in the theaters.  Wow, I have no life at all.  I want to finish 'The Fountainhead' and re- read the entire 'Harry Potter' series... and probably re- read the entire 'Twilight' series, though if you were to ask me, I'd say I won't.  I don't like to admit that I like those books, in case you can't tell.

I can't really think of anything else to say, not that it matters.  It seems like no onea really pays attention to Xanga anymore.  It doesn't matter.  I'm going to watch the usual Thursday lineup; Ugly Betty, Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice.  Peace out, kiddos.

False alarm...

I should have known.

Anyway, Merry Christmas.  Fa la fricken la...

Because I am pretty much in love with this kid, and it wasn't supposed to happen.  God fucking damn it.

I fell victim to Twilight.  Feel free to say "I told you so."  Just be forewarned that I will kick the ever- loving shit out of you if you do...

*Sigh*